Why Children Misbehave and How to Deal with it. 

Children misbehave for a multitude of reasons. Whatever the reason may be, parents are often left feeling frustrated, hopeless, and downright angry. No one can push the limits of a parent better than their sweet, beautiful three year old son or daughter. One second the innocent child is playing calmly with a toy, the next they are screaming bloody-murder over not being able to watch tv. Be reassured, your child is not unusual, they are not doomed to a lifetime of tantrums, bad behavior and screaming the word “no” over and over again. It all falls well within the normal realm of a healthy, developing child.

Why do children misbehave?

Parents often question why is their child behaving this way? Here are just a few examples:

Limited Communication Skills:

Young children lack the ability to take their emotions and translate them into a coherent sentence.  Instead of a child calmly announcing “I am feeling frustrated that kid grabbed the toy from my hand,” they instead may scream, hit or even bite. Even some adults struggle with this seemingly simple concept!

Attention Seekers:

Does your child often misbehave the second you decide to cook dinner or fold a basket of laundry? Well, there is a good chance they are struggling with sharing your attention. In a young human’s brain, they can perceive this as being left out and don’t know how to handle those feelings.

Toddlers Don’t Want Your Help:

Sometimes, it boils down to a toddler wanting to be independent and do things on their own.  However, this can be maddening when you are trying to rush out the door and they insist on putting their own shoes and socks on. When you offer advice or try to help them, they are known to throw a tantrum or even hurl their shoe across the room. This is the conflicting age that one second they are demanding your attention, but the next they are yearning for independence.

They Lack Certain Skills: 

Children are just that – children. They are not fully developed, nor have they been shown all the ins and outs and dos and don’ts. They may simply not know how to deal with situations because no one has ever shown them the right way. For example, a child physically lashes out because someone took their toy instead of properly expressing their feelings using words etc... Instead of just punishing them, make sure to teach them the right way to deal with situations as they arise. 

Misbehaving is Effective: 

It is simple. When children know the quickest way to get attention is by yelling, or the easiest way to get what they want is to throw a tantrum, they resort to these tactics time and time again. By giving in, parents are teaching their children to misbehave next time. 

They are copying others: 

Monkey see monkey do. Children learn to behave by watching others and their minds are like a sponge. Whether it is TV, video games, or family troubles, make sure to limit their exposure to negative stimuli that can influence how they act. Make sure to take the time to be a role model in their life that demonstrates the proper way to act, react, and handle situations. 

They are testing limits: 

Humans are curious creatures, and human children even more so. When you set rules, children want to know if your serious or if you will fold - they’ll break rules just to find out what the consequences are. This means that, as a parent, you should maintain consistency and set clear limits and explain the consequences beforehand. If they break a rule it is your duty to provide the punishment; otherwise, they’ll know what the real limit is despite idle threats.